It was the famous author Harriet Beecher Stowe who said that “she had in mind to write a novel about slavery – but the baby cried too much”. One woman has commented that it would have been more plausible had she said “but the baby smiled too much”.
The point is, many women find that if they are blessed with marriage and motherhood, the role is so fulfilling they find no time for other things. Obviously, Harriet Beecher Stowe eventually found the time to write Uncle Tom’s Cabin.
But for many women, they remain voiceless, by choice, because they are content.
Occasionally a woman will step out of her arena if she feels passionate enough to comment. Please let the following comments be viewed in that light. The role of women is not confining, but for many of us we find that God sets us “in a spacious place” (Psa 18:19).
There is also the risk of alienating women who do not fit in, due to circumstances such as being single, childless, unwell, disabled, and other situations in which a woman may find herself. I hope that these women can bear with patience another article relating to a situation she does not find herself in, and cannot relate to. Sometimes she has had no choice. Remember, “he setteth the solitary in families” (Psa 68:6), and it is our duty as nurturers of the ecclesia to remember and include such sisters.
Woman created second
It is in the Genesis record we are introduced first to woman. She was created second. This is a Biblical fact. It does not mean she was inferior, she too was created in the image and likeness of the Elohim. We need to see that being second is not second best. God wanted to make a point about the purpose of her creation. It is obvious He knew that man would be lonely and unfulfilled on his own.
Woman created out of man
But He didn’t create man and woman together, like the animals of the field. He already had a distinct role for woman as a “helper” for man. Like it or not, this is fact, and it is my belief that if one doesn’t understand this purpose of woman’s creation one will forever be discontent.
Universal laws
These are not only Biblical facts, these are universal laws. Across cultures and times, women have taken a supportive and secondary (in the sense that it is less public) role to man. This was partly due to the curse. Once God “greatly multiplied her sorrow and conception”, woman found herself bound to childrearing simply because she had to be. There was no option. This is still the case in developing countries. But with the advent of birth-control motherhood became an option and a choice. Birth control may be in some cases a blessing, but it has resulted in a situation where questioning God’s principles is possible, whereas in the past there was no question, because there was no choice either.
It is true that in some cultures women have been subject to terrible degradation and the violation of the most basic human rights, but that is also a result of the curse. This secondary role has created a situation where men can abuse their power, but we know that true Christian men do not treat women as inferior. Rather they acknowledge their benefit and even superiority in many areas.
Women’s rights movements began in the 1800s – part of the unclean spirits like frogs, “liberty, equality and fraternity”, which have croaked their way up to the 21st century until they are now a deafening roar. These groups attempt to blur the boundaries of the roles of women and men, with some success, but to great loss.
The equality of our reward
So man and woman were created equal, although woman was created second. She was created “for the man” although it is acknowledged all men are created “by the woman”. They are interlinked and interdependent in contrast to the majority of the animal world. There is a mutual need by both sexes for each other. How blissful it must have been to tend the garden of Eden in that perfect state.
It is obvious that in the Kingdom, women and men have an equal reward. They will both receive eternal life. There will be no marrying of saints, and each of us will receive our reward according to our works. It matters not in what sphere we work, we will be rewarded according to our faithfulness in it. Doubtless there will be some women who have been more faithful than their male counterparts, and will occupy places higher than some men. But what could be greater than immortality? We echo “the sons of Korah” when we say we would rather be anywhere in the Kingdom than outside of it (Psa 84:10).
It appears that there will be some kind of hierarchy in the Kingdom amongst saints, as there is with the angels now. It was the mother of Zebedee who asked Christ to give her sons a place on either side of him. As Christ responded to her, it was not his to give that hierarchy, but his Father’s. It was after this Christ gave the discourse on people who exercise authority over others – but how that his way was to be servant, and we are to be likewise (Matt 20:20–28).
The curse on the woman
It is seen in Genesis 3 that the woman was “first” in the transgression. She took the lead in listening to the serpent’s lies, then encouraged Adam to follow her example. As a result of this sin she was punished: “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be subject to thy husband and he shall rule over thee” (v16).
As she had taken the lead in the first sin, God now made it a feature of her punishment. Now she would be subject to her husband. In matters where they disagreed, she was to submit to his will. The wife was now placed in a position where her husband would “rule over her”. This grates against the independent spirit, but we cannot “kick against the pricks”. We need to submit to the will of God in this as in all things.
This curse is consistent with New Testament teaching on the subject. We are told that women are to “keep silent” in the gatherings because Eve was created second (1 Tim 2:12). She was not to exert any authority over man which a public teaching role would necessitate. This is an interesting argument, because there is no comment about the content of the public speaking, but rather the argument is based on the woman having “authority” over the man. The strength of the argument is in her audience, not her teaching. She is not permitted to teach a man due to the divine order and subsequent curse of Genesis 3, “as also saith the law” (1 Cor 14:34). Under the law, if a woman vowed a vow unto God, she was exempt from the vow if her father, or later her husband, overruled it (Num 30:3). We do well to pay attention to the divine order of things.
Even though the women of the New Testament may have been talented speakers and also possessors of the Holy Spirit, they were not to teach when the ecclesia gathered. It is clear that women did receive the Holy Spirit gifts and that they “prayed and prophesied” (1 Cor 11:5), but in light of 1 Timothy 2 and 1 Corinthians 14 it is clear that they were not to speak in gatherings of the ecclesia.
Rather Paul says to Titus that they should preach privately to their own sex about being “sober, (loving) [phileo] their husbands, (loving) [phileo] their children … discreet, chaste, keepers at home [house managers], good, obedient to their own husbands [as distinct from respect shown to men other than their husbands], that the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:3–5). Here Paul uses the Greek word hupotasso in the middle voice. This way he is requesting that wives voluntarily, willingly and actively be subject to their husbands. Their good behaviour could also be a means of leading disobedient husbands to God as in the case of unbelieving husbands (1 Pet 3:1).
It would be remiss not to dwell in some measure on house management, as this is the task which largely occupies us. Most women are good house managers, and some are not, but being a household manager is about so much more than keeping a clean and tidy house. As Sister Roberts wrote in her beautiful article about “fine houses and wasted time”, there are many worthwhile things outside of a home that a sister can engage herself in rather than occupy herself solely in keeping a house clean and tidy. “A sister’s calling required her to regard her house as a convenience in this wilderness state, and not as a thing she is to live for. It is not with her a principal object of attention. She will be careful to keep a clean house and a comfortable house, but a stylish house she has neither time nor taste for. What God requires of her will demand the time, and the skill, and the means, which a fine house would consume of her hands.”
Apparent inconsistencies
Some may see the teaching of Deborah and Huldah as exceptions to this rule which create a precedent. But the book of Judges is full of how God can use whatever is available to fulfil His purpose – if there are no men willing to teach then He will use women. The ass’s jawbone, blind Samson, Jael’s tent peg – all were used to fulfil God’s will. Deborah’s prophecy, “God will deliver Sisera into the hand of a woman”, was evidently a cause of embarrassment and shame to a great warrior, in just the same way today if a woman were to outmanoeuvre a man in the great chessboard of war. It is Deborah who gave us the beautiful phrase “a mother in Israel” – so Deborah arose as a busy bee, determined to save Israel’s villages. “Village life in Israel ceased, until I Deborah, arose, arose a mother in Israel” (Judges 5:7 niv). Rather than setting a precedent of leadership for women, the book of Judges and the story of Deborah show God’s capacity to use whatever is available and out of weakness be made strong (Heb 11:34). Deborah acted, not as a champion of women’s rights, but as a protective mother.
Additional thoughts
We should not copy Eve, who wanted to climb the status ladder to be equal to the angels, but follow the example of Sarah. Sarah called her husband “lord” in her heart, which shows that it was her habitual reference to him. We do not obey our husbands simply because they are right; we obey them because they are Christ to us. Men need respect. They feel encouraged by a woman who is respectful and appreciates their efforts to handle the responsibilities of life.
Here is a beautiful thing – because obedience to husbands is a command of God, then, instead of focusing on whether our husbands are deserving or undeserving, in faith we submit, not just to them, but to God, Who set down the principle. How much higher is submission when seen to be submission that is not dependent on her husband’s behaviour, but on the wife’s belief in God’s laws. She needs to judge what would best promote godliness in her husband.
It may be harder for women to submit to husbands who are less intelligent and less capable than they are. But whilst her job is hard, she is given no ‘loophole’, only examples like Abigail to follow. She is commanded, with the rest of us, to submit to her own husband.
It is hard for us to deal with the whole principle of submission. Submission is not a natural thing. It is about as welcome as the idea of childbirth. It has to be learnt, although there are some who seem happily meek from birth! Remember, meekness is strength under control. There are some women (as there are some men) who are independent and struggle with boundaries like these. Make it your ambition to learn submission. With much prayer and reading, God will help you to achieve this. He “gives us the desires of our heart”. This is not a problem peculiar to women. Men are also required to submit, perhaps in their employment, to an employer, but definitely in the ecclesia – “Yea, all of you be subject to one another” (1 Pet 5:5; Eph 5:21).
A woman may be very gifted, very intelligent, very self-assured and possessed of many talents, but she is not to use these in usurping God’s laws. For a woman like this, the laws of God may seem restrictive, but be assured that in her submission to them she will receive a crown that never fades away. Some may feel that a woman possessing talents like these is not reaching her full potential. But we must be assured of God’s creative omniscience, and that He knows best. Let her concentrate on achieving full potential in the areas God intended.
It is easy for women of ability to achieve recognition and success. Far, far harder is it to submit. This is the beauty of it. God has not based His credentials on ability, or on intelligence, He has based them on moral behaviour, the hardest battle. But these moral attributes can be achieved by anyone. You may be a doctor, or a dentist, a cleaner, or a house manager, but if with the Father’s help and grace you cannot conquer your own flesh, you will not stand in that day.
There is much wrong in the current world. There are increases in all sorts of sin, seeing lawlessness abounds. Could it not be possible that at least part of this is a side-effect of children not being reared correctly? Child-rearing is an enormous and sometimes thankless task.
Children, and we are all the child of someone, thank your mother for the countless tasks they did for you, but especially for preparing the ground that the seed of the sower could fall into. We should not underestimate the great power that lies in our hand for domestic happiness. Much of the happiness of the home lies in its heart, the woman whose home it is.
A sparrow is a homely bird, and a swallow more exotic. But as sisters, we all, whether sparrow or swallow, find a place of refuge in God’s courts, a place where we can raise our young in safety.
“Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young – a place near your altar, O Yahweh Almighty, my King and my God” (Psa 84:3 niv).